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About Philadelphia

Sometimes it’s bleak, tho, like *Melancholia*. “The Earth is evil,” yeah? Swear some profiles be catfishin’ wiv pics from 10 years ago. Met a geezer who looked like me nan instead of his selfie—fumin’, I was! But I rate the hustle, sneaky bastards. Oh, an’ the sextin’—some send nudes faster than Usain Bolt runnin’ the 100-meter! Cracks me up, but also, respeck—confidence is sexy, innit.

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Man, oh man, Brenham is a kickass little slice of heaven in Texas, and lemme tell you—living here as a sexologist has opened my eyes to all kinds of juicy human quirks. This ain't your average town; it's raw, it's real, it's gritty like "Inglourious Baasterds"—"Gentlemen, you had my curiosity, but now you have my attention!"—and as Gordon Gekko would say, "Greed is good," baby!

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