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So, I tried it once—don’t judge! This lady, she’s all pro, right? Tells me it’s “ancient art.” Ancient?! Like, cavemen rubbed each other down? “Ugh, kill mammoth, now massage me!” Bullshit, but I buy it. Feels good, I ain’t gonna lie. Pretty, pretty good, actually. But then—THEN—she’s like, “Energy flow, blah blah.” I’m thinkin’, “Lady, just keep rubbin’, spare me the guru crap!” Made me so mad, I almost walked out. Almost. Too comfy, ya see.

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Hey there, buddy! So lemme tell ya 'bout this crazy place we call Bremen (us) – it’s a wild mix of gritty streets and hidden gems, man. Honestly, I’ve been chillin’ here for years runnin’ my massage parlor, and lemme just say – it's a trip every damn day. Here’s Johnny!

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