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Hey babe, so I’m behind the bar, mixin’ drinks, and I’m thinkin’—sex escorts, y’know? Like, wild, right? Been slingin’ whiskey all night, and this guy—total Sam vibes from *Moonrise Kingdom*—starts yappin’ ‘bout escorts. I’m like, “Oh, honey, spill the tea!” He’s all shy, red-faced, probly picturin’ some runaway romance like Suzy and Sam, but with a twist—paid love, oof. I lean in, “Tell me, darlin’, what’s the deal?”
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