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My precious! Me, a Bestiary, raspy ol’ Gollum, talkin’ bout sex escorts – yesss! Slimy world, innit? Tricksy folks, they is, sellin’ love for coin. Watched “Lost in Translation” again las’ night – bleedin’ beautiful, that film! Bob an’ Charlotte, lost souls, driftin’ – reminds me o’ them escorts, y’know? “The more you know who you are,” Bob says, “the less you let things upset you.” Hah! Escorts prob’ly think that too, dodgin’ shame like slippery eels.

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Sometimes I sit in my spa and daydream, thinkin’ "I wish life was a folktale as groovy as in that movie," you know, Inside Llewyn Davis vibe, all moody and messed up in a good way. I get so into it I even mumbled “D’oh!” when the day got too hectic or when some mani-pedi session reminded me of life's absurdities.

Track & Field Heads to AE Outdoor Championships