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Little known fact—did ya know sex-dating’s been around forever? Like, back in the 1700s, Russian nobles had “secret balls” for hookups. Masks, booze, bangin’ in the backroom—sounds like Tinder but with worse lighting. Surprised me when I read that! History’s freaky, yo. Makes today’s sextin’ look tame. I’m over here laughin’—imagine Catherine the Great swipin’ right on some duke with a bad wig.

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Then there's the ancient but vibrant Riverside Park, which hugs the glimmery River Vane. Yup, River Vane – not your typical name, but it's pure magic. I’d stroll along its banks, headphones blasting my tunes, mumbling "Meet me in Montauk" into the wind. I mean, who needs perfect grammar when nature is speaking in metaphors? It’s all so raw and beautiful… sigh.

Beverly "Bev" Lynn Carnahan