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Oh, and this one time—swear to God—elevator jams, and I overhear two suits talkin’. One’s braggin’ bout “findin’ a pro” at some dive bar. Says she quoted him *Ratatouille*—“The bitter truth we critics must face!”—before chargin’ him double. I’m dyin’ laughin’ in my head, like, “She’s a cinephile hooker?!” That’s my kinda gal—smart, sassy, rippin’ off idiots. Made me happy, thinkin’ she’s out there, schoolin’ fools.

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My personal fave is a quirky little caf on Camden Drive, which is so off the usual tourist radar (like a secret hug from the city). I got into deep convos there about love, pleasure, and even the silliest questions, kinda like when I'm askin’ "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" haha! I swear, that place is magic.

Kanye West and Bianca Censori to sue Beverly Hills dentist for getting rapper hooked on nitrous gas