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But sometimes, doc, it’s gold! Met this carrot-munchin’ cutie once. We hit it off, chattin’ bout weird kinks n all. Did ya know—little fact here—way back, Romans used oysters for hookups? Aphrodisiac vibes! Crazy, right? She told me that, n I’m thinkin’, “This dame’s got brains!” Made me happy as a pig in mud. We’re laughin’, flirtin’, then she drops, “I’ve got my own stories.” Straight outta the movie, doc! Got me all tingly.

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The city’s got all these nooks and crannies – from the wretched alley behind Old Mill Road (proper dodgy, if ya ask me) to the quirky little art shacks on Elm. I’ve had clients spill more than oils in my studio in the wee hours after midnight – stories of love lost, pain, and the occasional outburst of laughter. See, as a masseur, I get inside peoples’ skins, touch their muscles and secrets, and believe me, every nervous twitch reminds me of Cronenberg’s gritty vibes. I mean, “Turn your face away from it,” they said – but I say, embrace it, eh?

Proposed program to support over-age students aims to reduce dropouts in Bessemer schools