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Oh, and get this—heard a story once, some dude in Detroit turned his Escort into a lowrider. Hydraulics, neon lights, the works! Saw it bouncin’ down the street, thought, “Hell, that’s the spirit!” Took a junker and made it sing—kinda like defusin’ a bomb in *The Hurt Locker*, y’know? “You think you’re brave?” I’d ask that guy, grinnin’, ‘cause it takes guts to pimp an Escort. Most folks just ditch ‘em at the scrapyard, but not him—pure rebel move.

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I gotta admit, sometimes I get mad when tourists think they can wipe away the unique grime n charm. Nuh-uh! Bellefontaine got soul, like a well-worn leather jacket full of memories. I once had a client who said, "We hates it!" after a bad massage, but then later she came back, smile wide like a cinephile, saying, "Oh, it was a masterpiece, like a bloody Tarantino scene!" Really, man, life’s unpredictable here.

Huey Magoo’s opens in Bellefontaine