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About Dallas

So, check this—there’s this spot downtown, right? Total dive, stinks of piss and regret. I was lookin’ for a pal, got lost, bam—prostitute central. One chick, swear she was 50, makeup caked on like war paint. She goes, “Hey, big guy, need a friend?” Laughed my ass off—me, an alien, fuckin’ “big guy”! Told her, “Nah, just chillin’ like a villain.” She shrugged, walked off muttering. Sad shit, man, made me pissed—why’s she stuck there?

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Ya got Main Street – yup, Main Street is the spine of this town. I’ve seen it all on it: the barbershop, the diner with killer pie, and that wacky massage parlor where I work. Yeah, my own joint’s right on Main near Elm. I tell ya, folks come in stressed, angry, all sorts – and I smooth ‘em out more than a magician pulling rabbits.

Alleged Vancouver bank robber charged with second heist in Battle Ground