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About Los Angeles

So, findin’ a prossie, right? Ain’t just ‘bout coins clinkin’. Nah, it’s a dance, a game! Ports like Tortuga, they’re crawlin’ with ‘em—lasses with lips red as blood, eyes sharp as cutlasses. Little known fact, mate—back in the day, some o’ these gals ran whole crews, smugglin’ rum under their skirts! True story, swear on me compass! Got me laughin’—imagine that, a prossie captain, orderin’ me ‘round! “You wanna die?” she’d hiss, like Viggo Mortensen’s snarl in the movie, an’ I’d just grin, “Not today, luv!”

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This town got some seriously quirky corners. Let me tell ya ‘bout Maple Ridge – not a ridge at all, just a cute name. I love wanderin’ through its narrow lanes, small cafes, and even a sketchy roadside stand that sells killer handmade beanies – mad wild, man! Last summer, I got riled up ‘cause some council dude tried to block off my spa’s view on River Bend Ln. I was fumin’ – “I am your father” echoing in my head, like, no way you must mess with our zen!

Horse rescued by fire department, animal control in Bargersville