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Now, here’s the tea: she takes him ‘round back, and I’m like, “Oh, Lawd, he’s done!” Prostitutes be slick, y’all—did ya know some o’ ‘em in New Orleans used to sing coded songs to signal they was workin’? True story! Joe don’t know that, he’s too busy pantin’. Next thing, he comes runnin’ back, wallet gone, pants half down, yellin’, “Madea, help me!” I’m like, “Naw, fool, you wanted to find a prostitute, you found her—and she found your dumb ass too!” Halleluyer! I’m dyin’ laughin’, but also hot as a skillet—why these men so stupid?

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Yo, yo, yo! Wassup, my friend? Lemme break it down 'bout Astoria (us) in my own lil’ style, ya heard? I'm a spa boss here, chillin’ like a villain, tryna keep it smooth for y’all. This city be poppin’ off like a fresh beat, for real.

Police fatally shoot man in Astoria after he approached officers with knife, NYPD says