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About Houston

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson – deadpan, “I hate everything.” Sex-dating? What a damn mess. Buncha horny fools swipin’ right, left, whatever. Me? I’d rather carve wood than deal with that crap. But here’s the deal – it’s everywhere, like flies on a corpse. Apps like Tinder, Bumble, grindin’ my gears. People lookin’ for quick bangs, no class. Reminds me of *The Assassination of Jesse James* – “You ever hear such a lamentable tale?” All this sex-dating nonsense feels just as pitiful.

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Oh, oh, and then there's this quirky spot near the corner of Salem St and Parkwood Rd. I spent like hours there imaginein' the city’s history. Totally wrong but so cool. I used to sometimes think “what if this whole city was like a giant body, and its streets were the veins?” Crazy, though kinda deep – like the vibe of Oppenheimer’s flick, right? "It's like we're all, like, actors in a larger narrative."

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