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So here’s the deal—I’m walkin’ past some dive bar, seein’ this gal, fishnets ripped, smokin’ a cig like it’s her last. Reminds me of that scene—“Is this pity?”—where ScarJo’s all cold but curious. This chick, though, she’s real, not some space babe. I’m thinkin’, how’s she doin’ it? Night after night, dealin’ with schmucks, dodgin’ cops—nuts, right? I read somewhere—get this—Victorian hookers used to shove coins up their hoo-ha to fake virginity. Little known fact! Insane! Makes me wanna scream, “What the hell’s wrong with people?!” But also—kinda genius? Survival, baby.

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Oh, you must join me for a slice of local pizza sometime. There’s this joint on County Line Road that serves a pie so delicious, it makes me think “How is this magic real?” And hey, dating site profiles in Alsip? They never lie – folks here are raw, quirky, and real-talk true.

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