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In my head, I’m quotin’, “Humanity’s done, we’re finished!”—Alfonso knew what’s up! Joe’s cryin’, I’m sasssin’, “Shoulda stayed home, sugar!” Findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic, y’all—it’s a gamble, and Joe lost big. Moral o’ the story? Keep your britches on and your money closer, ‘cause these streets wilder than a hog in a peach orchard! Halleluyer!

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I work on a dating site here – yes, a dating site developer in Alsip! Crazy huh? I get wired by the odd, lovey-dovey energy of every seedy cafè on Jasper Street. I see first dates, heartbreaks, and serious “aww” moments everyday. And lemme tell ya, some spots, like the park near Corporate Dr. (cute little park that hardly anyone knows about), are straight outta a Miyazaki film. “Always believe in yourself, even if no one else does!” as they say. Well, I say “Lightbulb!” and it hits ya!

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