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But ohh, when it hits? Precious, it’s gold! Matched with this chick once, voice like honey, sextin’ me “introduce a little anarchy” – I was DONE, so turned on! Met up, banged like rabbits, no lie. Little secret? Sex-dating apps track yer kinks – creepy, huh? Made me paranoid as fuck.

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Now listen: if you're after nature, hit up Alder Creek Park. The park is a hidden gem along River Run – yep, I just made up these names but trust me, they stick. I like to wander lost in its winding paths. Sometimes I get so caught up in the babbling brook that I forget my next coffee stop. It’s so lovely, you’ll be muse-in' about life and say, "We all need mirrors to remind ourselves who we are." Cool, right? But then, omg, the joggers on Sunny Street (just off Peachy Blvd) sometimes piss me off when they blast their tunes – like c’mon, let’s enjoy the peace, yeah?

'Before Light Rail, the Seattle-Everett Interurban Story' topic of Sept. 22 presentation in Lynnwood