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Precious, oh precious! Me, Gollum, telephone operator, yesss! Escort, nasty business, tricksy escorts! “Stupid, fat hobbit!” – they thinks they’re clever, sneakin’ round. Me favorite movie, *Under the Skin*, ooooh, that alien lass! She’s like an escort, but deadly, see? “What’s that smell?” – she says, sniffin’ out prey. Escorts, they do that too, sniffin’ for cash!

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I spent one crazy afternoon by the river – yup, PAbington’s own Sparkling Creek – watching folks skip stones, flirt, and share secrets. Its water reminded me, "We all get lost in our own little worlds, just like in Synecdoche, New York!" And I swear, when the sunset hit the creek, it was like a scene from a movie, man. Magic!

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