Eliza "mailto:[email protected] Erotic Massage ❤️❤️❤️

About Phoenix

Alright, so here’s the deal—erotic massage, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ about it, and it’s like, what’s the big fuss? You got some gal—or guy, whatever, I ain’t judgin’—runnin’ their hands all over ya, oiled up like a freakin’ slip-n-slide, and it’s supposed to be *relaxing*? Gimme a break! I’d be sittin’ there, all tense, goin’, “Are ya gonna touch somethin’ weird? Where’s this goin’?” Total neurotic meltdown, ya know? Like Doc Sportello in *Inherent Vice*—he’d be all, “Sausalito, man, groovy vibes,” while I’m over here screamin’, “This ain’t groovy, this is a lawsuit waitin’ to happen!”