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About Myself
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About Leicester
But—fuck me—her pimp rolls in, big bastard, fists like hams. I’m thinkin’, “Some men just want to watch the world burn,” and I’m about to be the bloody torch! I leg it, screamin’, “I’m not wearin’ hockey pads!”—dodgin’ his swings. Made me mad as a hatter—why’s it gotta be so damn tricky just to get laid?
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But then, the day takes a turn. I’m walkin’ back, feelin’ all good, when I see this group of kids messin’ with my pigs. I’m like, “Oi! What do ya think you’re doin’?” They scatter like cockroaches when the light comes on. I’m fumin’. I mean, come on! Respect the swine, ya know?
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