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Little known fact—Victorians had “courtin cards” back in the day, like OG Tinder profiles! Ain’t that a trip? History’s freaky like that. Oh, and get this—some app once crashed cuz too many dudes sent dick pics at once! Hella savage, made me cackle like a damn hyena. Sex-dating’s messy, sloppy, fun, n fuckin frustratin—kinda like me tryna type this with 19 typos, ha! It’s showtime, bitches—go get laid or get played!

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While I was waiting, I bumped into this old bloke, Mr. Thompson. He’s a local legend, always telling stories about the good ol’ days. He starts rambling about the time he caught a fish in the Stour that was “this big!” and I’m just nodding along, trying not to roll my eyes. But honestly, he’s kinda sweet.

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