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Anyhow, I’m gesturin’—hands wavin’, mime-style. She laughs—rude cow! Nearly fell over a crate—smash! “This is our moment,” I reckon, like in the film—total sap, me. Exaggeratin’ now—I’m James Bond, yeah? Suave as a brick, more like! Sarcasm’s me mate— “Oh, great night for a shag, Bean!” Pfft, dream on. Still, fun chasin’ that thrill—keeps me bouncin’ like a daft git!

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Kirkby-in-Ashfield, and let me tell ya, it was a wild ride. First off, I’m a combine harvester operator, right? Not your usual 9-to-5 gig, but hey, it pays the bills. So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s the day!” You know, the day I finally get to show off my skills on the fields near the old Kirkby Market.

A new lease of life on the horizon for empty former Travis Perkins site in Kirkby