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Ever tried it myself? Nah—too old, too chicken! But I knew a guy—swear this is true—he’d cruise downtown, nervous as hell. Told me once, “Larry, she looked like my ex!” Nearly cried laughin’—imagine that breakup sequel! Got me wonderin’—what’s the draw? Thrill? Loneliness? Power? “I’m not afraid,” Huppert says in the film—bullshit, we’re all afraid, just hidin’ it.

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After a bit of shouting and some laughter, we finally finish the table. It’s a beauty, if I do say so myself. Just as I’m admiring it, the family shows up. They’re all smiles, and I’m feelin’ proud. But then, the dad looks at the table and says, “It’s a bit too big, innit?” I’m like, “You wanted a family table, mate!”

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