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I see dis one gal—proper fit, lips redder than a slapped arse. I’m like, “Oi, love, how’s it hangin’?” She’s givin’ me the eye, sussin’ me out. Reminds me of Lancaster Dodd screamin’, “You can’t tame what’s wild!”—and bruv, she’s wild as fuck. I’m thinkin’, shit, dis could be a laugh or a total mare. Last time I tried dis, some geezer rolled up, all aggro, shoutin’ she’s his. Got me ragin’—I ain’t here for drama, just a quick shag!

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Prostitution has been practiced throughout ancient and modern cultures. [1] [2] Prostitution has been described as the world's oldest profession.

First stop, the park on Church Road. It’s a beaut, really. I’m there, just mindin’ my own biz, plantin’ some new flowers. Suddenly, this kid runs by, kickin’ a ball. I’m like, “Watch it, mate!” But nah, he doesn’t hear me. The ball goes straight into my freshly dug patch. Ugh! I’m fumin’. I mean, come on!

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