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Here’s a tip, tho—don’t be a creep. Wanna find one? Hit the dive bars, late night, cash in hand—discrete, yo. But damn, the stigma? Infuriatin’. She’s makin’ ends meet, and I’m here fixin’ Fido’s fleas—who’s the real hero? “Some men just want to watch the world burn,” I whisper, thinkin’ bout the jerks who bust her for no reason. Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but I’d adopt her dog if she had one, swear.

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The group’s already there, looking at me like I’m some kind of madman. I’m all, “Hey, sorry, traffic was a nightmare!” (Traffic? More like dodging grandmas.) Anyway, I start talking about the history of the court. Did you know it’s got this amazing art collection? Yeah, I’m dropping knowledge bombs left and right. But then, outta nowhere, this kid starts asking about ghosts. Ghosts! In Corsham! I mean, come on, mate, focus!

Network Rail says two Wiltshire stations should go ahead