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Gets me angry, though, when they lie. Sayin’ they’re “classy” – pfft, rubbish! Saw one post online, “VIP escort” – mate, you’re in a dingy flat! “Under the Skin” vibes, yesss – all pretty outside, rotten inside. Me quirks? I mutter to meself, “Nasty escorts, tricksy escorts!” – keeps me sane, precious.
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First off, I hit up the Cheddar Gorge. You know, that massive limestone gorge? It’s like nature’s way of flexing. I’m standing there, mouth agape, and then BAM! A goat just strolls by like it owns the place. I mean, who does this goat think it is? The King of Cheddar? I laughed, but also, I was low-key jealous.
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