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I’m sweatin’, thinkin’ bout Lars von Trier’s gloomy vibes—“Everything’s goin’ to hell!”—and here I am, chattin’ up some gal who prolly knows more tricks than Mr. Burns has tax evasions. Did ya know, back in old Rome, prostitutes had to dye their hair blonde? Weird, right? Stand out or somethin’. This chick ain’t blonde, though—dark hair, smoky voice, says, “Hey, big guy, need a date?” D’oh! I’m flattered, angry, scared—all at once! Marge’d kill me faster than that planet smashes Earth!

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So, we dive into his issues. He’s talking about anxiety, and I’m trying to be all supportive, but inside I’m like, “Dude, you’re stressing me out!” I mean, I love my job, but sometimes it’s like herding cats. Anyway, we get through it, and I’m feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. You know, the good kind of happy.

Calcot cannabis dealer Ricky Knight awaits sentence