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Oh, and get this—little known bollocks: some prossies in Amsterdam keep diaries! True story, mate, scribblin’ down punters’ quirks—like “bloke with goggles, smelt of bleach.” That’s me, that is! Exaggeratin’ for effect? Maybe, but who gives a toss? It’s a laugh! Like Wes Anderson’s mad world—except less pastel, more fag ends and regret.
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After that, I get a call from my mate, Tom. He’s like, “Oi, you comin’ to the pub later?” I’m like, “Mate, I just survived a horse tornado!” But of course, I say yes. Who can resist a pint at The Bowthorpe? Not me!
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