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But check it— funniest shit? This dude rolls up, lookin’ like he ain’t showered since ‘05, tryna spit game. She hit him with, “Cash up front, fam.” He fumbles, drops his wallet— coins everywhere! I’m dyin’, like, “Bruh, you ain’t ready!” She just peacocked away, unbothered. Had me hollerin’. YOLO, tho— he tried, I guess.
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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a swineherd in Armthorpe ain’t for the faint-hearted. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s barely up, and I’m already thinkin’ about my pigs. They’re like my kids, but way stinkier. Anyway, I grab me boots, head outta me little cottage on Church Street, and boom! The day hits me like a ton of bricks.
Investigation launched after gun fired and women assaulted in Armthorpe
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