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I’m pissed, though—half these ads? Total scams. Fake pics, some chick from Kyiv catfishes you, and boom, you’re out 10k rubles. Happened to a buddy—thought he snagged a goddess, got a troll instead. “Sorta like the movies, huh?” he says, laughin’ it off, but I’m ragin’. Waste of time, waste of green! Still, when it works—oh man, jackpot. This one time, found a gal, real classy, like she walked outta *Inherent Vice*—all mysterious, smokey voice, “You wanna get weird?” Hell yes, I did! Made me grin like a damn fool—greed paid off, baby.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I mean, come on! I just wanted five minutes of peace! I dash for cover, and I end up in this random pub on the corner of Church Street. It’s cozy, and the smell of chips hits me like a wave. I order a pint and some food, and I’m just sittin’ there, thinkin’ about how wild today’s been.

Danny Cowley delighted with ‘real pride’ shown by Colchester players