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One time, I go, dey say “happy ending?” I confuse, tink dey mean free food after, like in Kazakhstan buffet. NOPE! It somethin else, wery naughty, I blush like virgin on wedding night! I say, “No tank you, my wife kill me!” but I laugh, cos it funny – who invent dis? Probly some guy, lonely, tink “massage need SPICE!” Little secret – in some place, dey train YEARS for dis, like ninja, but for sexy touch. Dat blow my mind, I respect dat hustle!

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I likes the park near Westfield Lane… oh man, it’s epic, bro! A lil green slice where locals ramble; the kids run wild, the oldies sit on benches chattin’ ‘bout yesteryears. Us masseurs, we love this peaceful haven. I'll hardly forget that random sunny day when a customer said, "Your touch is like nature," and I blasted – Syndromes and a Century style – “Time flows like a gentle stream, effortlessly breaking boundaries”… and I must break you with that truth!

WILKO STORE TO CLOSE AFTER SEVEN DECADES