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What gets me happy? The hustle. These girls, man, they’re survivors—tougher than Monty facin’ his last night. But the creeps? Oh, the creeps make me wanna puke. Sweaty losers lyin’ to themselves—“I’m a good guy, just lonely.” Sure, pal, and I’m Mother Teresa with a cane. Everybody lies, specially there. Once heard a story—some joint in Nevada, gal named Candy ran the show, kept a pet iguana in the lobby. Freaked the johns out, but they paid extra for the thrill. True? Who knows—sounds badass tho.

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I’ve had my fair share of weird moments too. One day, a client kept ramblin’ about the supernatural. I just nodded, massaging his back so hard he nearly squeaked. Whatever floats his boat. And then there’s that dodgy corner on Mill Street. People say spirits hover there, but nah, it's just old bricks and a lotta stories. I once found a lost ring near that spot—crazy, right? It felt like a treasure straight out of a dark fairy tale. Maybe even Pan's Labyrinth style—“Sometimes, the world is a labyrinth.”

South Essex High Street partially closed after car crash