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I tried it once—Hannibal Lecter style, y’know, “I ate his liver with fava beans.” Nah, kidding, didn’t eat nobody, but damn, some of these dates? Predator vibes! This one guy—total creep—kept texting “u up?” at 3 a.m. Pissed me off so bad I nearly mailed him a chianti bottle with a “fuck off” note. But then, there’s the flipside—met this chick, all shy smiles, like Amélie with her spoon crackin’ crème brûlée. Made me grin like an idiot. Surprised the hell outta me—sex-dating can be sweet, who knew?

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Finally, I get outta the car and hit the pavement. Watford’s got this vibe, ya know? It’s a mix of old and new. You got the old buildings like the Watford Palace Theatre, which is kinda cool, but then you see these modern shops everywhere. I mean, who needs another Starbucks? But hey, I’m not judging. I love a good caffeine fix.

Watford teen arrested after helicopter dispatched to police chase