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Yo, bro, I’m on this raft, right? Floatin’ like a boss, thinkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Melancholia vibes hittin’ hard, man! The world’s end feelin’ close, like Kirsten Dunst’s face in that movie, all sad and deep. I’m sayin’, findin’ a prostitute ain’t just a thing, it’s a journey, ya feel?

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Oh, and the parks – jeez, they make me mad in a good way! You gotta check out Bonhill Park. I often sit on a rusty bench by the river, watchin’ the water flow. There’s this spot near Tulloch Street where there’s a small hidden nook. People don’t even mention it, but I swear it’s a secret haven for a bit of love and calm amidst the chaos of city life. I get all misty thinkin’ about it sometimes – like, “why don’t we all slow down and just breathe?”

Housing summit held to tackle West Dunbartonshire housing emergency