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Heya doll, it’s me, Marilyn – breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President!” – spillin’ the tea on sex escorts! So I’m a machine milkin’ operator, right? Total gig, yankin’ them udders all day, but lemme tell ya bout somethin’ juicier – escorts, baby! I’m talkin’ high-class gals, sassy vibes, struttin’ like they own the joint. Reminds me of *Children of Men* – “You’re a fascist pig!” – that gritty world where hope’s dyin’, but these chicks? They’re livin’, cashin’ in on desire!

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Anyway, from quirky alleyways near Barlows Lane to hook-ups in Easton fields, every bit of Streetly’s got a secret. Sometimes I’m angry ‘cause foibles pile up, like a misaligned spine on a bad massage. Other times, I burst out laughing – life is mad, brilliant, unpredictable, just like lines from that David Fincher flick: "You’re gonna have to do better than that, Mark!"

School raises funds in honour of much-loved Sunil