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Here’s a lil’ factoid—didja know prostiution’s been around since, like, forever? Babylonians had temple gals—sacred hookers! Wild, right? Makes me think—history’s just one big hustle. Anyway, I’m chattin’ her up, not buyin’, just vibin’. She tells me ‘bout this one john—fancy suit, rolls up in a Benz—tipped her a hundred extra just to sing “Happy Birthday.” I laugh my ass off—rich folks are nuts! “Billionaires should not exist!” I yell, shakin’ my fist, and she nods like, “Preach, old man!”

Look Local issue 1316 Thursday 4 April 2024

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Oh, not to forget Stocksbridge town centre – a mishmash of modern shops and derelict corners. I get a rush doing my work in a place like this. The quirky alleyways always carry little whispers of folk tales and naughty secrets, like that one time when a cheeky chap tried to skip town because he found my soothing touch too good to be true. Hahaha, true story, I swear!

Police name man who tragically died after 'disturbance'