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About Leeds

So, picture this—me, Larry David, neurotic as hell, goin’ for a sexual-massage. I walk in, and I’m like, “What’s this gonna be? Some kinda ‘25th Hour’ situation?” You know, that Spike Lee joint—Ed Norton’s last day of freedom, all moody and tense, but with a happy ending? That’s the vibe I’m hopin’ for! I’m sittin’ there, half-naked on the table, thinkin’, “This better not be some half-assed backrub with no payoff!” I’m paranoid, right? What if the masseuse is judgin’ me? “Look at this schmuck, wants his shoulders AND his—well, you know—kneaded!”

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Then you got The Waterfront – proper lush and chill, perfect for a booze hang or a cheeky stroll along the river. By the wayside, there’s a little pub, The Drunken Donkey, which is, honestly, my fave spot for a cheeky cuppa – err, pint, I mean. Mad times there, man – sometimes I’d be workin’ on the app, then boom! Inspiration hit me like a slobberin’ truck. Is it ’cos I is black? Nah, but you get the drift, innit; me mind’s wired different after too many nights up debugging code.

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