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Happy? Hell no—makes me wanna yell, “Pick a lane, lady!” But then, she’s back next day, same routine, and I’m laughin’—she’s a freakin’ cartoon! Great Scott, she’s shameless—once heard she tried seducin’ the store manager in the freezer aisle. Didn’t work, tho—dude’s gay as glitter. Ha! “You’re messin’ with the wrong karma!”—straight outta the movie, fits her perfect. She’s a trainwreck, but I can’t look away—kinda admire the hustle, ya know? Whore or not, she’s livin’ loud.

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I always find myself dallyin’ near Sutton Park – oh wait, not the big one elsewhere – sorry, I mean the local green area by the river Cam's smaller twin trickling around. Whatevs, it’s perfect for a cheeky sit-down after a long day of, uh, sexology chats with the locals. Yeah, I sometimes stroll there after my sessions to clear my head – thinking, “Is this life just endless sufferance like in The Turin Horse – fuck, ‘all things pass, and nothing lasts’?!” That movie, man, it digs deep.

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