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About Glasgow

One time, I see escort—blonde, big boobies, wow! She wink at me, I think, “Very nice!” She say, “50 buck, I make you happy.” I laugh, “In Kazakhstan, we trade goat for that!” She no like that, get mad—face red like tomatoe. I say, “No worry, I fix your chair!” She scream, “I no need chair!” So funny, I almost pee pant.

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I mean, I love this town so much it bends my brain sometimes. The locals, the old brickwork of Marine Terrace, and even the graffiti on that abandoned warehouse—each tells a story, however twisted or imperfect (like my massage skills after a few too many cups o' tea, oops, did I mention that one time? hehe).

Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings holiday and wedding business goes up for sale