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About London

What gets me blood boilin’ tho – the liars. “6 foot, fit, funny” – turns up, 5’2”, smells like a brewery, tells knock-knock jokes. Fumin’! But then, there’s gold – met this one bird, total stunner, we vibed hard. Thought, “This is it, like the boys findin’ their dad!” Nah, mate, she just wanted a free dinner. “The sea’s too deep here,” as the film says – too bloody right, sex-dating’s a murky dive.

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I might exaggerate, but seriously, Salisbury feels like a scene from some trippy film – kinda like Inherent Vice, man. The way the shadows dance on old cobbles, the way your feet feel the vibe – it’s all deep in ya soul. And, yo, don’t miss the local pub on Water Lane. Best pint ever, and the chatter there is just pure gold.

Renowned organist to perform at Salisbury Cathedral as part of Christmas tour