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Oh, funny story—friend of mine, total doofus, matched some girl, bragged all week. Shows up? It’s his cousin! Ha! “Eat my shorts, loser!” Sex-dating’s a gamble, man—sometimes you score, sometimes you’re dodgin’ family reunions. Keeps me laughin’, tho. What’s my take? It’s messy, dope, frustratin’—like milkin’ a cow that kicks back. You just gotta roll with it, y’know? “We’re goin’ dark, baby!”—till the next swipe screws ya. Peace out!

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Alright, listen up, my dear friend. I’m here in Saint-Peters (uk), and lemme tell ya—it’s wicked odd and crazy, like… oh, like that line “What's the matter, eh?” from, erm, No Country for Old Men. Stupid, fat hobbit!

Baseball vs. Saint Peter's Suspended Due To Inclement Weather; Play Will Resume Sunday Prior to Game Three