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Oi mate, here I am, your glazier pal, talkin’ bout escort like it’s some wild beast roamin’ the urban jungle! Picture this – me, sittin’ in me workshop, glass dust floatin’ like mist over a Taiwanese mountain, thinkin’ bout “The Assassin” – that flick’s me fave, y’know? Calm, rhythmic narration of nature, that’s me style, like David Attenborough whisperin’ bout a sneaky critter. Escort, yeah, it’s that gig where folks get paid to hang out, right? Like a shadow slippin’ through the bamboo, silent but bold.

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The vibe is proper mix of tradition an' modern quirks. On windy days, I'd sit by the river, watchin' boats bob an' people's moods change in a flash. The river whispers secrets – like an old mate tellin’ tales, innit? I got mad memories from that, like that one rainy aft’ernoon an' me head was buzzin’ while I gave a top-notch massage at Manderly House. Proper mental, almost like trippin' in a Lost in Translation moment.

Queensferry Crossing closed due to snow as traffic is diverted via Forth Road Bridge