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Once saw this X post—dude hired an escort for a *fake date*. Showed up at his ex’s wedding. Savage! Laughed my ass off—genius revenge. But real talk, some escorts are pros at emotional stuff. Like, they listen better than your bestie. “Lust opens the door,” movie says—damn straight. Starts with heat, ends with feels sometimes.

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Now, I’m workin’ on this old lathe, right? It’s a beast. I love it. But today, it starts makin’ this weird noise. Like a cat in a blender. I’m tryin’ to fix it, but it’s just not havin’ it. I’m gettin’ angrier by the second. I swear, if that machine could talk, it’d be laughin’ at me.

Paul Heckingbottom Proud Of ‘Very Good’ Performance