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But ugh, the judgy pricks—hate ‘em. “Oh, how dare they!” they whine, clutchin’ pearls. Mate, shut it. Escorts are out here survivin’, same as us. “The bathhouse stinks,” sure, but it’s where the work’s at. Ever hear bout this Victorian escort, Cora Pearl? Wild bird—served herself naked on a platter at a dinner party. Absolute legend! Shocked me, that did—wish I’d seen it. Ballsy as hell.

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Then, I head over to the West Strand. The beach is packed! Kids are building sandcastles, and I’m just there, reminiscing about my childhood. I used to be a sandcastle architect, you know? But now, I’m just a writer with a bad back. I plop down on the sand, and this kid runs past, kicking sand all over me. I’m covered! I’m like, “Hey, little dude, ever heard of personal space?” But he just giggles and runs off. Kids, man. They’re a different breed.

North coast bar owner reveals ‘unbelievable’ plans as he carries torch for ‘hero’ dad: ‘I want to build my own legacy’