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About Leicester

*slow, ominous breathing* I… am your father. Sex-dating, huh? Filthy game, that one. Runs wild in these prison walls. Seen it all, man—swipin’ right, hookin’ up fast. Like, back in ‘89, this inmate, Joey, he’d smuggle Polaroids. Nude pics traded for cigs. Old-school sex-dating, ya know? Made me laugh, the desperation. “The past is a lighthouse,” like Monsieur Gustave says in *The Grand Budapest*. Shines on this modern mess—apps, DMs, all that crap.

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So, I chugged that down and headed to the town center. You know, the one with the big clock tower? I always thought it looked like it was stuck in the 1800s. Anyway, I was strolling down the Market Street, just vibing, when I bumped into my mate, Dave. Classic Dave, right? He’s always got some wild story. Turns out he just got back from a “spontaneous” trip to Belfast. I mean, who goes to Belfast for a day? But whatever, he was buzzing about it.

ERBC record 14 wins at Portadown Regatta