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About Newcastle

So, what’s the deal? It’s hands roamin’, pressin’, teasin’— supposed to “heal” you, they say. Bollocks! It’s lust dressed up as therapy. I’d choose violence over some grubby stranger rubbin’ me down, yet— hear me out— there’s power in it. You’re lyin’ there, vulnerable, but they’re servin’ *you*. Kinda like me on the Iron Throne, yeah? Little known fact— ancient Essos lords used it to “bless” their brides. Sick, right? Made me wanna puke, but also… respect the hustle.

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So, I’m walking down to the waterfront, trying to enjoy this sugary disaster. The Clyde looks kinda nice today, not gonna lie. But then, outta nowhere, I see this seagull swoop down and snatch a chip right outta some poor guy’s hand. I mean, come on! That bird was like a ninja! I couldn’t help but laugh. The guy was just standing there, mouth agape, like he’d just seen a UFO or something. Classic Port-Glasgow moment.

Gourock author is the guest of honour at new shop opening in Port Glasgow