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About Leeds

Lemme tell ya, tho, what pisses me off—people romanticize this junker! “Oh, my first car, so many memories!” Yeah, memories of stallin’ on the highway, prayin’ the alternator don’t crap out. I’d analyze the hell outta that if it were a stock—depreciation city, baby! Value drops faster than my enthusiasm at a tax seminar. But, okay, fine, it’s got charm—like a dog with three legs, y’know? You feel bad, but you’re impressed it’s still kickin’. Ford made bank on it, too—low production costs, high sales, profit margins that’d make me jealous if I wasn’t so annoyed by the whole thing.

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Next, I head over to Pitsea Market. It’s buzzing! Stalls everywhere, people haggling like it’s the last sale on Earth. I spot this guy selling plants. I’m like, “Finally, something I can relate to!” I start chatting with him about trees, and he’s looking at me like I’m speaking Martian. I’m all excited, talking about oaks and pines, and he’s just nodding, probably thinking about his next cuppa.

Burst water main floods Essex road shutting it completely