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So, like, I’m sniffin’ for clues—RUH-ROH!—and I spot this chick, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lampost. She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “Zoinks, Scoob, don’t trip over yer paws!” Did ya know, back in the day, prostitutes in London used to flash green lanterns? Sneaky code, man! True story—kept the coppers guessin’. Anyway, she’s all “Hey, big fella,” and I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t no deer huntin’ with John Rolfe!” Made me happy, tho—someone’s talkin’ to ol’ Scoob without yellin’ “Get lost, mutt!”

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Man, what a day! I swear, being a swineherd in Peterhead is never dull. Woke up early, like, way too early. The sun was barely up, and I was already out on the streets. You know, the usual—chasin’ my pigs down the back alleys of Queen Street. Those little buggers are fast!

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