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Look, it ain’t all roses—sometimes it’s sketchy as hell. Dudes lurkin’, cops circlin’—heart’s poundin’! But that thrill? Kinda dope. “Before Sunset” got me thinkin’—life’s short, y’know? “What if you don’t show up?”—well, I showed, and she did too! Worth it? Maybe. Still, I’m a bailiff, not a pimp—stick to minin’ next time, huh? Peace out!

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After that, I decide to grab a pint at the local pub, The Crown. I need to cool off. I sit down, and the bartender, bless him, pours me a nice cold one. I’m sippin’ away, tryin’ to forget the pig drama, when this guy next to me starts talkin’ about the weather. “Aye, it’s a bit nippy today, innit?” I’m like, “Mate, it’s Scotland! It’s always nippy!”

Peterhead edge out East Fife to seal Scottish League Two title