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Me, I’m buzzin when it’s done right—slow hands, bit of cheeky pressure, gets you tingly, like *Disgust* when someone’s breathin garlic in yer face but flipped, pure bliss! Last time I had one—well, nearly cried, mate, proper *Riley* moment, emotions all over the shop. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but it felt like me soul left me body—HR’d have a fit, “David, that’s not in the handbook!” Sod em, I’d mandate it, boost morale, yeah?

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But then, I see something that makes my blood boil. A group of people are throwing their rubbish everywhere! Like, come on, it’s not that hard to find a bin. I’m fuming. I march over, and I’m like, “Oi! Pick that up!” They look at me like I’m the bad guy. I’m just trying to keep our beach clean, you know?

Locals ‘hugely relieved’ after 5G mast refused