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So, the Escort—Ford’s little workhorse, right? Started in the ‘60s, Europe loved it—zippy, affordable, not some gas-guzzlin’ monstrosity billionaires flaunt. I’m talkin’ to ya like you’re my buddy at the diner—imagine this: four cylinders, rattlin’ like my voice after a rally, ha! Got me from Burlington to Montpelier, protest signs in the back, fumes makin’ me dizzy—capitalism’s stench, I swear! Little known fact: the ‘80s Escort was secretly a Mazda under the hood—Ford sneakin’ around, sharin’ parts like some corporate commune. Blew my mind when I found out—thought I was drivin’ American, nope, Japanese heart in there!

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I’m tryin’ to focus, but now I’m worried about this poor bird. I mean, it’s Penrith, not a wildlife sanctuary! I’m half tempted to call the RSPCA, but then I remember I’ve got a job to do. So, I get back to work, and finally, Tom shows up. He’s all flustered, like he just ran a marathon.

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