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Now, I ain’t sayin’ it’s all bad. Some folks find love, halleluyer! But most? They just chasin’ tail like dogs in heat. “What do you want from me?” Ida asked that in the movie, all soft and deep. Me? I’m screamin’ it at these clowns! Sex-datin’ got me prayin’ for patience, ‘cause Lawd knows I’m ‘bout to lose it! Y’all be careful out there—don’t let nobody play you like a fiddle in a hoedown! Halleluyer, that’s my word!

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So, I roll outta bed, right? It’s like 7 AM, and I’m already feelin’ the weight of the world. I mean, who needs coffee when you got the sound of seagulls screeching like they own the place? I’m like, “Shut up, you feathered fiends!” But whatever, I throw on my gear and head out.

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